Spiderlike tentacles oozing all over her face. Bulbous eyes full of malicious hate and devilish pleasure at her struggles to free herself. Neil's face, his gloating smile and cursed hands that tear at her flesh, taking sadistic delight in her humiliation and pain. Fight on fight on...to no avail and the pain grows worse and worse, she tries to scream...

Light. From nowhere a shaft of purest softness catches her in its arms. So comforting, so healing, so loving. She looks up and it is Gabriel's face she sees, the tenderness his arms around her...

She sits up abruptly in bed with a little gasp. The vertical blinds over the sliding glass door are drawn, warm sunlight filters through the chinks, puddling in a pool of golden on the hardwood floor. Her arms automatically wrap around herself as memory floods back.

The baby...the sudden ache in her back, her stomach, brings back the events of last night. A sense of barren loss and grief tears through her heart for a fleeting moment before she forces it away. No use dwelling on what has occurred. Strength. Determination. There is work to be done.

Gabriel...almost instinctively her eyes turn to the desk in the corner. He is there, fast asleep. She pushes aside the covers and slowly pulls herself from the bed to move over to him. Even in repose there are lines of weariness etched into his face. Unconsciously she brings her fingers up to stroke his forehead oh so lightly. He stirs, a soft little sigh escaping his lips.

She draws back quickly, afraid to wake him. As the black silk of her sleeve brushes against his face, he stirs again, turning into it with a little sigh of content. A soft smile trembles on her lips. I loved you once...her heart whispers. And perhaps...no. I know I still do. The tuggings of the heart grow stronger; impulsively she bends down to brush her lips against his forehead. Flaming color rises to her thin face. Back away Bronx...while you can...In an instant she has slipped out the door.

Cinnamon. Caramel. The familiar scents in her beloved kitchen calms her breathing. Almost on instinct she reaches for the flour in the canister. Eggs. Milk. Shortening.

The dough is easy to knead, so soft and yielding. Coffee. She must have put the percolator on. The warm smell of hazelnut coffee mingles with the air. Cut, shape, pat down. The fragrant aroma of fresh biscuits wafts across her senses a few moments after she sets the tray into the oven. A clink of cups. Sugar, cream. The tinkle of a teaspoon dropped into the coffee cup. The ceramic is warm, oddly comforting. She cradles it in both hands, warming her chilled fingers.

Gabriel is still sleeping as she sets the cup down in front of him. Her robe brushes his arm; he stirs a little, then opens his eyes. "Coffee..." His voice is thick with drowsiness. "Where'd that come from..." His sleep-drenched gaze focuses on her face. "What...Hey. Get back into bed..." He sits up, a slight frown on his face. "You're not supposed to be walking around."

"I'm fine Gabriel." Strangely enough she does not feel antagonized by his order. A slight smile curves her lips. "Breakfast should be ready soon."

The frown grows deeper. "Don't make me pick you up and put you to bed Matsu." He gives a long stretch then stands up. "Now get in there." He nods in the direction of the bed. She gives a shrug and a little chuckle but does as he asks, with surprising compliance. He moves to tuck her in. "Now just stay there, be a good girl and rest up." As he begins to move out the door, he stops and turns back to her. "Breakfast's in the kitchen? All done?" She nods. "Yeh. Biscuits are in the oven Gabriel. Hope you like coffee. It's all I got so far."

He gives her a look. "You're impossible. Now stay there and don't move or else." He disappears out the room, still muttering to himself.

When he does return it is with a tray complete with coffee cup, silverware, a small pot of lemon curd and a plate of biscuits. The sight makes her laugh. "I never imagined you as domestic Gabriel." He retrieves his cup from the desk after setting the tray on the bedside table and scowls at her a little before breaking into a reluctant chuckle. "Neither did I."

Birdsong in the woods outside. The occasional chitter of squirrels, the harsh squawking complaint of a passing seagull. Tranquility and a warm comfort she has never felt before. She steals a glance at Gabriel as they eat in easy silence. Be still my beating heart...she scolds herself mentally, a portion of that dominant independence and practicality asserting itself again.

"You're a good cook, Matsu." Gabriel's voice breaks her reverie. He settles himself from where he has been sitting at the foot of the bed. "Do you always hide some of your more obvious talents like this?"

She arcs a brow and wrinkles her nose at him. "Cooking isn't a talent Gabriel, it's a skill almost /anyone/ can learn." Her emphasis on the "anyone" is not lost on him. "Why do it yourself when you can pay someone else to do it for you?" he counters. "That way I do the economy a favor by providing work at fast food restaurants."

A laugh breaks from her. She lays the tray aside on the bedside table, a quick toss of her head and she draws a breath. "Well then...I take it there's a lot of research to be done." Gabriel glances at the SIDNEY console and frowns a moment, a familiar preoccupation overtaking him. "What were you doing?" She knows it is an unnecessary question. Perhaps it is more to hear his voice, so strangely comforting, than to broach the subject at hand.

"I was checking some notes on that thing..." An odd expression on his face that she is at a loss to interpret. "I think that there's something that I need to tell you about myself." A pause. He clears his throat uneasily. "I... found something about my family recently... Something strange."

Her eyes immediately dart to the talisman. "I didn't think you got that at a garage sale."

Gabriel rolls his eyes, ignoring the comment. "Anyway, my family are a part of a tradition for... for fighting these sorts of... incidents."

Her heart almost stops beating. Kindred souls....her mind whispers. The strange little flutter and tug at her heart gets stronger but she forces it back. "You beat me to it seems..." A wry smile. "I was going to tell you something similar last night. Before that...thing." An involuntary shiver as she remembers. "My father's family tradition's...something like that."

He nods, running a hand through his hair. "I noticed the mirror. You don't find things like that at garage sales either." She makes a face at him as he rolls the chair over and taps the SIDNEY console. "Copycat." He smiles faintly at that. "Anyway, this is a remote access to a database of all the information that we've compiled over the course of generations of my family... I was looking for reference to that thing."

"Well, that's something I can more than help with." Her voice is businesslike, brisk. Before Gabriel can answer, she continues. "I've a laptop in my studio Gabriel. If you'll bring that to me, since you won't let me get up..." Another wrinkle of her nose at him. "I can work from here. No arguments."

*

Only the clackety-clack of two keyboards tapping can be heard. The occasional hiss of frustration from Gabriel. She types rapidly, spewing out query after query in a steady stream. "Gabriel..." He looks up. "I've a stack of books and papers in the closet. Second door, the small cupboard thing inside...Can you get it for me?"

"Sure." He stands and strides to said closet, sliding the doors open. "This thing here?" He tugs at a door. "Jeez it's jammed tight...what do you have in here?"

She cranes her neck to look over; almost at once an expression of alarm crosses her face. "No Gabriel not that one...!" Her voice sounds oddly frantic. He turns to gaze at her. "What do you mean not that one..."

Whatever else he is about to say is lost as a sudden rush of objects tumble onto the floor in a confused heap. Knitting needles. A few balls of angora wool. A half-finished lacy shawl, some baby mittens, a sweater, more needles and wool. A few pattern books.

A pregnant silence. Her face is burning; she can feel it creeping down to her neck. She raise her eyes to Gabriel defiantly. His face is a study, one brow raised. He bends to retrieve a stray pattern book, fingering the pages slowly. "Didn't see you as the type who'd knit Bronx." His gaze roams over the mess on the floor. "Not bad for a punk-haired rockette."

She scrambles out of bed in an instant, down on her knees gathering the wool and needles before he can stop her. "Don't you DARE tell anyone Gabriel...don't...you...DARE." Dear God how embarrassing. As he moves to help her she hastily tosses the pile into the cupboard, snatches the rest from him, throws that in too and slams the door shut. "I told you not to open that cupboard!" she storms.

Gabriel calmly folds his arms and stares down at her, brow quirked. "It's not my fault I'm not familiar with the insides of your wardrobe, Bronx." He glances to the open closet and purses his lips. "I didn't know you wore lace either." This in reference to a beautiful dress of hand-made lace, obviously Victorian and vintage, hanging in plain sight on a padded hanger.

She is bright crimson in the face and she knows it. A further wave of color as his eyes sweep her critically for a moment. "That hair doesn't match the period, but wigs can do wonders. Not that you wouldn't look good in that dress as is." She struggles for words. "Now get into bed Bronx, or I'll carry you there."

A mutinous look and a deep drawn breath as she glares at him. A toss of her head as she gets slowly back into bed again. "You forget everything you've seen there Gabriel or I swear I'll..." The sentence trails off, hanging ominously in the air. He quirks a brow as he opens the other cupboard. "Or you'll what?" He lifts out a stack of papers and books and brings them over to her, laying them down on the floor.

Another glare. She ignores the comment and grabs a book out of the pile. "Just get back to work. There's a sight more that can be done when you're actually /working/, not flapping your mouth off."

*

Shadows lengthening into dusk. She raises her head, eyes widening slightly. Where has the time gone, she wonders for a wry moment. The tapping of Gabriel's keyboard sounds with staccato clarity. A soft sigh and deep breath as she rubs her eyes and enters in yet another query on her laptop.

A sudden sharp intake of breath. "Gabriel." He looks up, his face furrowed with concentration and intense irritation. it Bronx, I swear I don't know how Grace works this thing..." His voice trails off as he gazes at her face. "You found something?"

"I think so." Elusive memory as she frowns and tries to recall. "Gabriel did you notice anything peculiar about that thing's smell?"

He frowns. "Smell? It stank, that's all I remember." He watches her intently for a long while. "Why?"

Something tugging at the recesses of her mind. Memory, something...important that she cannot seem to remember. She glances down at the laptop screen. "Earth...soil? Do you remember anything like that?"

"Now you come to mention it...Yeah, I do remember. Rotting earth." He shakes his head. "Disgusting."

Rotting earth. The memory leaps out, takes hold of her consciousness. Her fingers fly over the keys, typing in 2 queries in succession. Reaching down, she tugs 3 books out of the pile on the floor. "Here Gabriel..." She tosses the books to him. "Look up elementals for me. There should be quite a list somewhere in there..." All the while, her fingers rapidly tap on keys.

Search strings and queries fly across the screen. Soil....earth....the memory is there, elusive as a shadow, but by god, she vows silently, I will track you...So intense is her concentration that she starts when a frustrated curse from Gabriel sounds. it Bronx! I can't find any mention of elementals!"

She looks up, a touch of impatience on her face. "It's there, Gabriel, I know it. I've looked them up before." A rustle of papers and further tapping of keys. "I'm telling you Bronx. I can't find elementals." Gabriel's voice sounds more than a little irritated. "Try the index, Gabriel, that's what it's/for/," she shoots back as she taps in yet another query string. Another frustrated hiss from him. She tosses the laptop onto the bed. "Bring the thing here Gabriel, I swear, I could find it faster than that! It's so SIMPLE!"

"I suppose you have a Ph.D. in research, Miss Know-It-All!" he retorts, nettled. He brings the books over to the bed, where she snatches them out of his hands. Her fingers riffle through the well-worn pages, her face an engrossed mask of intense concentration. "As a matter of fact I do, Gabriel." She pauses in her search only to toss out that one reply before resuming.

Silence for a brief moment. When she does look up, Gabriel's head is tilted, a smirk of utter disbelief on his lips. "You can't honestly expect me to believe that you went on to study -more-?!" In answer she reaches down towards the pile of books and papers. A bound hardcover volume is tossed in his direction and she resumes her thumbing of the book pages. "Elementals...Air, earth, fire, water...Nature spirits, Gabriel, for crying out loud, dammit! It's all here!" She waves the book under his nose infuriated, even as he glances over the cover of the volume she threw at him.

"Comparative Literature: Chinese and Japanese Mythical Texts? Cambridge, England??" His voice is incredulous. She looks up again. "Yes Gabriel, that was my dissertation." A pause as she flips to the middle of a large book. "Go look up elemental spirits in that will you? And don't even tell me you can't find it. Look under Nature Spirits in the appendices, if you can't find it Elements should give you something. If not, fertility gods." He mutters something under his breath which she completely ignores.

A rustle of pages. Fire lords...wraiths...there it is I knew I'd seen it before...Her fingers stop at a page. "Gabriel. I've got something."

He comes over to sit beside her on the bed. "Now I know why I have a research assistant."

She gives a snort. "Poor girl." Her fingers stab at a paragraph in the middle of the page. "Nature spirits. Earth elementals." His breath brushes her cheek as he leans over. "Earth elementals. I don't think I've heard of those before Bronx. Let's see."

She reads slowly. "Earth elementals. Spirits that derive from the earth, protectors of the sacred earth mother and the delicate balance between nature and chaos. Worshipped as fertility gods and goddesses by ancient religions and cults alike..." Skip a few paragraphs, skimming until she reaches another section. "The conjuring of these earth spirits must be proceeded by extreme caution, as by nature they are amoral and can be of either malignant or benign temperament. A smell of decaying soil and strong earth indicates the presence of such spirits in manifestation..." She stops and draws a deep breath. "Nature spirit. Specifically earth spirit." A furrow on Gabriel's brow as he leans back. "Sounds mighty like, Matsu." He runs a hand through his hair. "SIDNEY didn't come up with anything specific."

Sudden weariness. She sets the book aside. "Maybe you're not searching the right search strings." A wry chuckle as Gabriel gives a snort. "Yeah, yeah. Leave it to the Permanent Head Damaged woman to come up with a way to mock my research skills. Like I would know that elementals fall under earth, wind, fire, fertility gods."

A weary chuckle from her. "Gabriel, don't worry. I've done even stupider things before in life." She ponders, hugging her knees to her chest. A long pause. "I was in love with you once."

A strangled cough from Gabriel; she can feel his gaze so intense upon her. "Excuse me?" She finally deigns to look up, flushed cheeks and all. His eyes are wide and his breathing seems caught in his throat. "You're kidding..."

A shake of her head slowly. "Do I look like I'm kidding?" A little rueful smile curves her lips. Time flows by "I... I don't know what to say, Matsu..." A bewildered silence. He shrugs and looks down. "I mean, I'm flattered... really I am." Strong, you've got to be strong Matsu...you can't give in now, her mind echoes over and over. She lifts her shoulders faintly. "Oh well. Vanity of women and all that stupidity. Don't worry. I'm ...over it."

Silence. Gabriel's voice breaks the stillness at last. "I really had... no idea, Matsu." A pause. His eyes hold her own dark ones in an intense, soul-searching gaze. "You... you were always so..." He swallows. "So cold." The words almost break her heart. Cold...Oh Gabriel if only you knew... I tried to forget... but I just can't, I loved you once God forgive me I love you still, her heart cries out. Her eyes challenge him, defiant in their steady gaze. "I was proud then Gabriel. And so were you. I wasn't anything to you. And I don't think you would cared have even if you noticed."

A soft sigh from Gabriel. Unbroken gaze, each reaching into the depth of the other's soul. "You don't know that Bronx." His voice so quiet over the whir of the two computer fans. Dark almond eyes widen; her cheeks pale slightly. "...Explain." She cannot recognize her voice, strained and ragged.

A long silence. He turns away, looking down at the floor behind him, struggling with the words. "Who knows what would've happened if you hadn't... If you'd given me a chance to notice." Oh no dear god, no...not this...A myriad forgotten dreams, so sternly suppressed, cut loose from their moorings to lay hold of her, the bittersweet of memories left to die so strong she can almost taste it. Be strong Matsu, she admonishes herself silently, fiercely.

A short nod. Her face smooth, tight, too calm. "Like said. Stupid." A twisting ache in her heart that has never really gone away, so strong that her breath constricts in her chest. Long unfocused stare at the wall. Arms wrap tightly around her knees. "Oh well. Been there done that. I'll get over. Always do." A sob catches for a moment in her throat. The tears spill over despite her fierce silent injunctions to remain calm.

"Hey." Gabriel's voice prods gently, breaking in on her thoughts. "We've got work... remember?" Work. Yes...some solace from this heartache at least. A small nod. "Yeh." But she gets up from the bed slowly, crosses to the sliding door and stands there for a long long moment, arms wrapped tight around herself."

A sudden gentle touch on her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Matsu..." Gabriel. His voice barely a whisper. "We were both different people then. Change has made us into something that's bigger than both of us... Bigger than anything." He turns her to face him, gentle but firm. "Matsu." He tilts her chin up to look into her dark eyes. "I know that you're down right now but.. we've got so much to accomplish..." He smiles; at that her heart skips a beat. "And just so you know... I always thought you were hot."

A wide-eyed stare of blank surprise. Her mind whirls. "I...I still think you are," she returns gruffly, flushing hard. A soft chuckle from him as he pulls her close. "Matsu, we'll get through this yet!"

Strange how even in the midst of grieving her heart warms. "We'll get through it all right Gabriel." A soft chuckle. "I'm a weed. And you. Well..." She glances up at him for a moment, then suddenly leans up to plant a kiss firmly on his lips. "You're a dear. Even if you can't research worth a Gabriel shakes his head. A soft smile she has never seen plays on his lips. "Thanks... And you're okay too... when you're not in the way."

A snort from her. "Bah! Just like a man!" And yet there's a softness in her eyes that transforms her face into something so appealing, so innocent. A moment longer as she lingers in his embrace, then pulls away. "Well we've narrowed it down to earth elementals and nature spirits. Let's see what else we can dig up...." Her voice is back to its brisk, businesslike tone.

Back to the bed. Books fly, papers strew. "What exactly you looking for Bronx?" Gabriel's voice is slightly bewildered. A wry chuckle from her. "Nature spirits are part of many cultures, Gabriel, I'm just looking for some references in the more obvious cultures." She burrows into the pile of books, pulls out 3 thick volumes. "Starting with Native American legends and myths."

Time wings its way by. Rain ceremonies, no...no...drought...perhaps that's getting close, balance of nature...wait. That's it... "Gabriel." Tired eyes, sore neck from poring after volume upon volume. He is at her side in an instant. "What've you found, Bronx?"

The paragraph is brief. A legend of how a tribe conjured up a nature spirit by accident, but its powers were so fearful that they had to banish it into an earthernware vessel, sealed away with shamanistic magic. The creature could take any form chosen, but not perfectly; there was always deformity, always misshapenness. It brought with it a stench of rotting earth, decay and horror. Indeed, great rejoicing followed when it was finally banished.

"They say the vessel is known throughout legend as the Urn of Balance, Gabriel." Her eyes hurt from so much reading. Gabriel's hand brushes her hair briefly, comfortingly. She reads on. "Or the Urn of Tranquility, depending on translation...."

"Hey...Urn of Tranquility?" His voice carries just a little touch of excitement. "I'm sure I read something about that just a while ago..." He dives into a pile of books, motioning her to the floor. She joins him. A pause as he turns through various books, then a sudden grunt of triumph. "Here it is...I knew I saw something about it." He hands her the book, pointing to the large color photograph on the page.

A sudden catch of breath. Her throat constricts. Involuntarily she snatches her hands away for a moment. "Bronx....?" Dimly aware of Gabriel reaching his arm around her. "What's wrong...?" Even through the sudden sick nausea that engulfs her, she can hear the sharp concern in his voice.

A quick shake of the head, a trembling deep breath. "Nothing Gabriel. I...I've seen this urn before that's all." Oh my god...no....not this again...She is trembling.

"Where, Bronx?" His voice is softly prompting and even amidst her fears, she marvels that his presence is such comfort. When she does speak her voice is colorless, brittle as glass. "Neil's office."