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The Knight Before Christmas

Written by Phil Colvin,


Chapter 3

Santa’s’ Workshop

Santa was getting ready to leave. It was still only the 23rd, but he’d got into the habit of making a few orbits of the world first so he didn’t get too dizzy on the night. Elves were scattered around the place tying packages to the sleigh, addressing cards and doing numerous things to the wrapped gifts. Santa waited until no-one was looking before reaching for his hip-flask.

"Santa!", called a small elf from across the room. Santa hid the bottle.

"Yes", he spluttered, "What is it?"

"I’ve just been doing a last few check lists and I’ve found this present for ‘St. George’s Books’"

"Yes, I put that in."

"Sir, according to our records the owner is an adult...."

"I know, but yesterday I found this old letter, it must have been misplaced...", he pulled out an old and grubby letter written in felt tip pen. The elf read it out.

"Dear Santa, I know it’s asking a lot but could you please bring me back my parents for Christmas because I miss them a lot. Thank you. Gabriel."

"I didn’t even visit him that year", said Santa quietly, "I didn’t know."

"So why are you giving him a present now?"

"Just to let him I know I care."

"You’re quite a guy."

"I know." Santa ran his hand through his beard.

"Well, sir, we’re ready to get this show on the road!"

"All right, I’m ready". Santa got on the sleigh and put the letter in his pocket. He had prepared a special present for Gabriel, and he intended to visit him first. He looked at the reindeer.

"OK, chaps", he said, sternly, "I’ve added the power steering now but I’ve been finding the turns a little rough so I’ll need you lot to cover that. And the back engine is a bit rusty, but I haven’t had time to replace it." The reindeer grunted, they weren’t particularly necessary in this day and age, but it was tradition.

"Whenever you’re ready!", shouted the elves.

"OK!", shouted Santa, "Smoke me a kipper! I’ll be back for Breakfast!", he called as the engines switched on. With an almighty roar, the sleigh began soaring down the runway and up into the sky.

St. George’s Rare Books

Gabriel could hardly contain his laughter. He was sitting in the front of the shop with Mulder, Scully and Grace. Mosely was still asleep in the back room. The police had finally left after an extremely embarrassed Mulder had informed them it was, in fact, one of their drunk colleges who had crashed into the bookstore and now Mulder was facing the hardest task, Gabriel’s gloating.

"I find it hard to believe you thought Mosely was a little green man!"

"I had to follow up the lead...."

"Oh yeah, and I suppose you’ll be staking out a house on Christmas Eve to catch Santa for breaking and entering?"

"Actually we busted him in 1994, but I let him go because he gave me a free candy bar.", and to his credit, thought Gabriel, Mulder actually sounded serious.

"So how long are you in New Orleans?", asked Grace who was desperately trying to change the subject.

"Not long....", said Mulder.

"So where you are you spending Christmas?"

"Apart", said Scully very quickly. She had been more than a little upset to be dragged down here by Mulder who had promised her an alien autopsy for her troubles. All she had was a case of the flu and one drooling novelist who she suspected was still going through puberty.

"So Scully...", said Gabriel, "...are we finally going to go out on that date?"

"Well, straight after that lobotomy, sure." Gabriel sighed, she had turned into the spitting image of Grace. There was a time when Scully and Gabriel might have actually gone out together, but then there had been a little nasty business involving Gabriel being arrested for the suspected murder of von Glower in Munich. Gabriel might had gone to prison had Mulder not based his entire case on von Glower being a werewolf. So Gabriel was set free and he parted company with Mulder and Scully for over two years.

It was at that moment when Mosely appeared from the back room. He looked really bad and was a little shocked to find himself standing in a room with two extra people than he thought there should be.

"Am I still seeing double?"

"Nah, Mosely. This is Agent Mulder, he thinks you’re an alien. When you’re ready, you can go show him your UFO", said Gabriel before cracking up again.

"Eh?" "Don’t worry about it, Mosely", sighed Grace, "We’ll tell you all about it later."

"Look, guys", said Scully, "It’s been enchanting seeing you all again but we’ve got to arrange some transport out of here."

"Why don’t you follow a light in the sky, someone might give you a lift", smirked Gabriel. Mulder smiled.

"We’ll arrange our own, thanks. Can I use your phone?"

"Yeah, it’s out back. But don’t you have a mobile phone:?", asked Gabriel as Mulder walked past. Mulder didn’t answer, but he did position his arm to neatly elbow Gabriel on the head on his way through.

"Are you sure?", sighed Mulder as he heard the reply. Scully stood watching, Mulder just shrugged, this looked bad. He put the phone down.

"What’s happening?"

"Apparently there are freak storms heading this way, the whole airport has been sealed off."

"What?!"

"I’m afraid we’re stuck in good ol’ New Orleans for Christmas", sighed Mulder.

"What about accommodation?"

"That’s the other bad news, all the hotels, motels and dog kennels are full from here to Florida. It’s more packed than Hilary Clinton’s suitcase on a visit to Paris."

"I sometimes think the whole world is against us", sighed Scully.

"So do I", smiled Mulder, "But I just put it down to a Government conspiracy and an old guy with a nicotine addiction."

"What are we going to do?"

"Do you know anybody in New Orleans?"

"No...and I’ll assume you don’t either, you don’t even have a dozen friends in D.C."

"Merry Christmas to you too, Scully."

"So what are wee going to do?"

"There is one option. It involves a few sleepless nights, bad company and a lot of begging."

"Get ourselves drunk and try and convince the police to lock us up?"

"No", said Mulder as he pulled back the curtain and pointed at Gabriel. "Although I think the prison idea will be easier on all of us."

Back in the other room, Gabriel and Grace were talking too.

"I can’t believe how rude you were!", said Grace, "You know what Mulder’s like..."

"Yeah, a double crossing git who wants to lock up people for saving the world!"

"You have to admit, he did have good cause."

"How do you mean?"

"Gabriel, your list of charges was longer than your laundry list! Murder, arson, theft....You probably broke every law in Germany!"

"I was just doing my job"

"And so were Mulder and Scully"

"Well, as far as I’m concerned the moment they walk out of that door today I never want to see them again. Not even if they came on their hands and knees!"

"Did you hear that, Scully? He wants you on your hands and knees", smiled Mulder. Scully shook her head.

"I’ll try some gentle persuasion instead", she smiled as she drew her gun and headed into the front room.

"Gabriel", she said "We need a place to stay tonight." Gabriel smiled, this was better than he could ever dream of.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, and seeing as your shop is the only place nearby we would like to make use of your facilities."

"Well, baby, my facilities are always at your disposal....."

"I was referring to your floor and two sleeping bags....and of course your coffee machine."

"Well, I don’t know....it is Christmas and we’re a bit full up here..."

"Gabriel, you know I wouldn’t ask unless I was desperate." Gabriel smiled, he loved desperate women.

"Well, it would be lovely, Scully, but I’m afraid I can’t help you. It looks like you’ll be stuck trying to get comfortable a hire car....."

"And that’s your final word on the matter?"

"Yes."

"Well, I suppose it’s time for Plan B.", she said as she revealed the gun and placed it in front of Gabriel’s face.

"What the hell is this for!"

"It’s my way of saying that I’ll enjoy staying here. Understand?", Scully smiled.

"Scully, I hardly think you’re going to kill me."

"I know.", she smiled as she aimed the gun downwards. Quite a long way downwards, just below the waist....Gabriel gulped.

"I’ve just remembered that I have a couple of sleeping bags out back..."

"Really?", said Scully in fake surprise.

Whilst Gabriel desperately searched for sleeping bags to save his manlyhood, Grace made some coffee for Mulder and Scully.

"That was very diplomatic.", smiled Mulder.

"Sometimes people need a little more persuasion"

"How are you two?", asked Grace, "Any interesting cases"

"Oh, you know", smiled Mulder, "We tracked monsters, mutants, get embroiled in a large conspiracy and we both came back from the dead"

"Huh?"

"Long story", sighed Scully as Gabriel walked in from the other room,

"Okay, I’ve set out the sleeping arrangements. Grace gets the bed..."

"I’m honoured"

"....Mosely, Mulder and Scully have sleeping bags...."

"Great", said Mulder, "I love floorboards"

"...and that leaves me with the bathtub."

"Very appropriate", smiled Scully, "A haven for all things slimy and unsightly."

"Just remember you’re both guests"

"Oh, we will", smiled Scully. "And I would like to be woken up at 10 AM tomorrow with breakfast and black coffee."

Above New Orleans

Midnight

Santa checked his watch, it was now Christmas Eve. When darkness fell, he would begin this year’s run. He wondered what would happen if, by some bizarre coincidence, something weird happened to him and he wouldn’t be able to complete his job, but the thought past and he got back to work...


Continue to Chapter 4

If you have any comments, you can email Phil Colvin at sculder_mully@geocities.com.

In the meantime, return to the main Fan Fiction page...


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